missionalgrace

Time?

2006-03-06T20:41:00.000-05:00

Where does the time go? I realize that everyone experiences this phenomenon frequently, but even so, when you have the epiphany that it time is flying by, it is still pretty crazy! As you could imagine, things have been quite busy around church -- and when I am not at church, I try to get down to Calvin (that's my off time ... nothing like spending time outside in the beautiful weather and building things!). Recently, I have been really fighting the urge to become apathetic with the church. It is quite easy to do really -- I suppose because we're already 2/3 of the way done and now know where seminary stands, the big 'next steps' are already stepping in some ways.

None the less, there is still much that can be done at church. In fact, perhaps it's most important now more than ever to be working hard --- we've really been making a push with the college students lately (results vary). You can pray that I come to work each day finding the joy for which I want to spend my life doing ministry -- not the busy schedule that lies on my desk each morning. That being said, I'm heading off to read for awhile - the other thing that seriously suffers from the "Busy Day" syndrome I have spoken of. Hope all are well ... glad to see someone reads this thing every once in awhile. I'll leave you with another favorite picture from my collection ...

This is the "Crystal Curtain" - a Tiffany Stained Glass stage "curtain" at the Palacio de Bellas Artes (Palace of Fine Arts) in Mexico City, Mexico. It's really big, and really pretty.

New Times

2006-02-22T22:43:00.000-05:00

These are new times for me - and I would suppose for many of you who are reading this. Perhaps you're still in school, or just out of school - but in either case, you are on the precipice of many new beginnings. That is me for sure. For those who haven't heard yet, I was accepted and will be attending Princeton Theological Seminary in the fall (Greek school technically starts in the summer). For me, that's a hugs change in life as I know it. A new school, a new subject matter to learn, a new environment to get accustomed to - oh, and did I mention - a completely different culture than the "Bible Belt" south that I have grown up in?

It's a double edged sword - exciting new beginnings are ahead, and yet so many unknowns to navigate. How do those work together? At this point, I am just thankful to have Kate to support me in the new endeavors, whatever they may be. And you, too, of course!

For your viewing pleasure, a photo of what is to come. Specifically, this is taken from a bridge in Central Park (NYC), looking back onto the Manhattan skyline at sunset. Deepak and I went on a daytrip while we were visiting Princeton the week before Thanksgiving.

And this is the same bridge, looking the opposite direction to the pond on the other side ... I thought it was photo-worthy.

It Works!

2006-02-21T23:26:00.000-05:00

I really am working on this whole blogging thing. I mean ... so it's been a few (cough) months?!? None the less, things continue on here. I was struck tonight at how much I've missed my close friends these last couple of months (plus ... for those of you who moved away before). So, here's to all of you wild and crazy friends out there, that is - if you even read this. I'll be trying to get in touch with you all ... so watch out. Leave me some lovin! I'll give you one of those big update things before long, I promise.

Broken World

2005-11-29T23:20:00.000-05:00

My heart weeps tonight - for the world. For whatever reason, sometimes God gives you a super-awareness for things -- and for me tonight, that's our brokenness. Our brokenness in relationships, in our jobs, in our homes. So alas, my heart weeps. My heart weeps for all whom I know and love - no matter what your struggle is tonight, my prayers are with you.

A Tale of Three Cities

2005-11-22T16:44:00.000-05:00

It was the best of times . . . It was the worst of times. Well maybe that takes it a little to the extremes, but in a way it is true. As I have mentioned before, I have some big steps coming up over these next few months - and while they are exciting, new beginnings - they are also terrifying, anxious steps as well. This truly is a tale of three cities.

My time and search for a seminary to go to has narrowed me down to three in particular -- Pittsburgh Theological Seminary (Pittsburgh, PA), Columbia Theological Seminary (Atlanta), and Princeton Theological Seminary (Princeton, NJ). As you can see, 66% of these options do not lie within the state lines of GA -- let alone with in 600 miles of Atlanta. I am excited by the prospect of going to seminary -- essentially training to work in and with the Church as my vocation. Unfortunately, this isn't a terribly easy process - especially because the decision cannot be a simple cerebral exercise in logic. By that, I am referring to that mystical word we often use around the church -- "calling". Yes, factors like financial aid and academics are an important factor in a seminary decision - but in all reality, there is so much more. It is this sense of calling that I am struggling with.

In speaking of a calling - I am speaking of being spoken to. I seek God's will -- and the place that God is calling me to be in - and I haven't heard that spoken clearly, which is frustrating and disappointing and nerve-racking all at the same time. How can one discern when they are being called anyway? What does a calling include? Surely God uses circumstances to help direct a calling right? How much weight should be given to circumstance, how much to academics, how much to financial aid, how much to proximity of family? It's not an academic process though -- there are no clear variables which can be adjusted and manipulated to extract a clear, definable answer. It's not that simple.

Seminary is very much what you make of it. At least that is the word on the street - I hear it repeated over and over again. In that case, it should not matter where you go - they are equally great - right? On the other hand, there is the fact that Princeton boasts academic excellence; that Columbia "produces pastors"; that Pittsburgh is missionally minded in much that they do. Each school has particular benefits - and particular shortcomings. Columbia isn't the most balanced school when it comes to theology; Princeton is accused of making 'robot's not pastors sometimes; Pittsburgh's average age is like 30 something years old for the students. Where do you start?

Of course none of the afore mentioned truly takes into account the family (both actual and Church) that I have in Atlanta. It doesn't fully take into account Kate - and our relationship - going on three years now. It doesn't take into account my friends, relationships, or ties to Atlanta. It doesn't take into account that I haven't been out of the south for more than a few days - ever. So many variables to consider. I could pro / con myself until death took me over - quite literally. But what to do?

I am afraid, that I am pretty sure of. I am afraid to hear what God says to me. I am afraid to hurt people closest to me. I am afraid to disappoint those around me. I am afraid of the prospect of changing the life that I know so well. And yet, I want to hear His call. At what point will my desire for complete public approval submit to God's word? Yes, there are a few factors that must play an integral role. For example, Kate and I are a team - it matters greatly how she is feeling and what she is thinking. As well as my family. Opinions and comments can be spoken by God through people - they are important as well. But when it comes down to it -- at the heart of everything - I have to stop and listen and be patient. I just wish it was easier done than said. Will you pray for me, please?

Transforming the Mores of Society

2005-10-20T00:57:00.000-04:00

"There was a time when the church was powerful - in the time when the early Christians rejoiced at being deemed worthy to suffer for what they believed. In those days the church was not merely a thermometer that recorded the ideas and principles of popular opinion; it was a thermostat that transformed the mores of society . . . . But the judgment of God is upon the church [today] as never before. If today's church does not recapture the sacrificial spirit of the early church, it will lost its authenticity, forfeit the loyalty of millions, and be dismissed as an irrelevant social club with no meaning for the twentieth century. " - Martin Luther King, Jr. from "Letter from Birmingham Jail"

What more needs to be said? The Church is to be bold - Jesus was bold.

Just a little

2005-10-11T22:29:00.000-04:00

It took me exactly three blog entries before I got busy and stopped the 'blog'. Ah, and I had such great aspirations of being a 'good blogger' - you know, I didn't want to be 'that guy' that never writes anything, and yet - I am indeed 'that guy'. Oh well, my apologies!

Nonetheless, I am here -- it's been an interesting journey over the last couple of weeks at the church. When you are a member at the church, you can come and go - and never really have an idea of all that goes on behind the scenes. Sure - you may get a little taste here, or a little taste there - but never the full picture. Not that the full picture is necessarily bad -- it's just not what all you would think of with a church.

Church like business -- not what you think from the pews - and yet in so many ways it is. In fact, it provides an interesting dilemma - where is the balance between business man and pastor. On the one hand, church leaders must constantly consider and worry about the budget and money and expenses - and on the other hand, communicate to the congregation that we should be faithful people and trust that the Lord will supply all that we need. At times it can be very frustrating - and yet I love it. The challenge for church leaders is how to remain centered - how to remain faithful to our calling and our biblical examples. The fact of the matter is that we cannot let the business of the church become the business of the church -- the business of the church should be a faithful adherence to the upward call of Christ - and ultimately that is why we (as pastors ... or me, as ministry intern) do what we do.

Thus, perhaps you can understand why it can be frustrating to work in the church sometimes. Are those 6 hours of meetings every week really pleasing and uplifting to God? That's the ultimate goal right? And yet, those meetings are necessary, aren't they? As a church, we must be weary not to fall into the consumer-driven performance trap of numbers all the time. The pressure is constantly there - especially in a church where business people are the majority of the crop. And while numbers certainly can be a sign of successful and vital ministry, a ministry's success and health can never be fully defined by its size -- because size doesn't always represent fruitful, deep, meaningful discipleship ministry.

Yes, it has been awhile since I last wrote --- and clearly, I have had a lot stored up in my head both positive and negative about the Church, but I love being there - and I am ever thankful that I have the unusual chance to see it now and know fully what I am being called to as I enter this next phase in my life. I leave you with this quote included in a book that I am reading right now.

A.C. Dixon said "When we depend upon organizations, we get what organizations can do; when we depend upon education, we get what education can do; when we depend upon man, we get what man can do; but when we depend upon prayer, we get what God can do."

Where do you start?

2005-09-14T23:02:00.000-04:00

I spent the last 2 hours of my day at the church today in a meeting about disaster relief. I think that even after all that talking, in some way we are still asking "where do we start?". I know there is tremendous need both locally (evacuees) and distant (gulf states) -- sometimes it is simply hard to figure out what are the most pressing needs that we can best fill. Human tendency is to want to fulfill any and every need as you hear about it - but as a leader for a group of people, you have to narrow the focus a good deal, even if it means saying no to certain things -- and if you know me at all, you know that's not easy!

Nonetheless, there are many good options that we are trying to work with. The key is that we are doing work and making plans in occordance to what the community needs - not just what will make us feel good and stuff. That's a tricky - and common - trap that people in the church (universal) tend to fall into. Doing missions and other things because it makes us feel good. Anybody can do that -- but we're called - as Christians - to something more -- that's the whole Gospel message thing. Being a follower of Jesus should make us unique - different - out of the ordinary - and that should radiate through all that we do. Not just in mission work or volunteering here and there - but in our friendships, workplaces, and even our relationship with ourselves. (a relationship with ourselves? yes -- you have a relationship with yourself ... just accept it and go with it, ok?)

Anyway, all of that to say that I have come to realize there will be many many many conversations to come -- I just pray that I can be used to facilitate sharing the Kingdom through that all.

Where to go?

2005-09-06T21:42:00.000-04:00

I received the application packet from Princeton Theological Seminary in the mail today. This in itself is no news, I mean, I requested it last week - of course it would come to me in the mail. However, it signifies the first real and tangible evidence that I will soon have to make some pretty major decisions in my life.

As you may or may not know - I am currently working at North Ave. Presbyterian Church -- and one of the many things I am to do is to decide about seminaries -- or more specifically, which one I am called to attend. Thus, I am looking at several different options. Princeton (NJ), Pittsburgh(PA), Fuller(Cali), Columbia(Atl), Reformed(Atl) and perhaps a few others. There are lots of choices -- but figuring out my calling -- where I am to be -- that's another question. It isn't just a simple decision of who offers the most money - or which school most closely matches my specific theological convictions. But that's ok -- I figure, my college education was decided without ever visiting a school -- I can spare a little extra effort now, right? Adios for now

One small step . . .

2005-09-03T01:16:00.000-04:00

One would think that I had a terrible aversion to the blog, and one would be correct - to a point. But alas, here I am. The blog is an interesting fellow, and surely I will get to know him well. So, without further pomp and circumstance - here I am world.